Showing posts with label ledge. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ledge. Show all posts

Monday, May 24, 2010

God, Why is it so hard to...

...trust you?
Why is it so hard to just let go?
Why is it so hard to give it all to you?
Why is it so hard to place my life in your hands?

I can give you one issue. I can ask you one question. I can reveal to you one wound.
But you can't have all of me.
Why?

There are so many things coming up that I'm unsure about. Maybe it takes an unsure moment to demonstrate trust, to develop faith.
My Sunday School days taught me that faith is "being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see". It's ringing in my ears because someone taught me years ago.
But, in all practicality, how can I be certain of what I cannot see? That's like saying, "I'm certain there's a little village over that hill." How can I say that? Because in Disney movies, there's always a little village on the other side of a hill? Because I want there to be a little village over there? Because someone told me there's a village - I just haven't seen it with my own eyes yet?
I'm going to go with the last one.

God, you told me you'd never leave me nor forsake me (Joshua 1:9 - another gem from Sunday School). You told me to be strong and courageous. You told me you would supply every need I have (Phillipians 4:19). You told me your grace is sufficient for me (2 Corinthians 12:9). Do I believe You? God, my amazing, incredible, outstanding, extraordinary, Almighty God... Do I believe you?
Why not?

If the Creator of the universe promised He loved you and would never leave you, would you believe him?
Yes, outside circumstances might prompt you to doubt. It's normal to doubt. We put a lot of stock into what our parents do, and the abandonment of a parent might cause you to fret about God one day abandoning you. That's normal.
But God is not normal. He's super-normal, supernatural, and phenomenal. His word is final and absoute. 2 Samuel 22:31 says, "As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him." 1 Kings 8:56 tells of a specific example, "Praise be to the LORD, who has given rest to his people Israel just as he promised. Not one word has failed of all the good promises he gave through his servant Moses."

1 Chronicles 16:10-17 explains,

Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.

Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always.

Remember the wonders he has done, his miracles, and the judgments he pronounced,

O descendants of Israel his servant, O sons of Jacob, his chosen ones.

He is the LORD our God; his judgments are in all the earth.

He remembers his covenant forever, the word he commanded, for a thousand generations,

the covenant he made with Abraham, the oath he swore to Isaac.

He confirmed it to Jacob as a decree, to Israel as an everlasting covenant...


If you can't trust God, whose words are documented and verified a thousand times over, who can you trust?

Monday, May 17, 2010

In Your Ocean I'm Ankle Deep

My prayer tonight...

In your ocean, I'm ankle deep
I feel the waves crashin' on my feet
It's like I know where I need to be
But I can't figure out, yeah I can't figure out

Just how much air I will need to breathe
When your tide rushes over me
There's only one way to figure out
Will you let me drown, will you let me drown?

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

And the water is rising quick
And for years I was scared of it
We can't be sure when it will subside
So I won't leave your side, no I can't leave your side

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

In a daydream, I couldn't live like this
I wouldn't stop until I found something beautiful
When I wake up, I know I will have
No, I still won't have what I need

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

(Something Beautiful, By: NeedtoBreathe)

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Poetry No. 4

Once Before

I put my foot over the ledge
once before

I pulled up my bootstraps
tied my scarf tight
put on my big girl panties
once before

I put my foot over the ledge
but instead of His wings to lift me
all I felt was my body tumbling down
once before

And I can't
I just cannot
Let go of my safety net
And take that first step
Because I did
And even though it seems good, I tumbled down the cliff
once before