Wednesday, October 20, 2010

I Can't Do This

After the first couple days of classes, syllabus shock set in. I was terrified to even open my syllabus, afraid that some big monster would jump out and drag me into a mismatched calendar or a dayplanner with missing pages. But then I realized it was okay. I can write chapter summaries on the book of Mark in two weeks. I can make a Portfolio Outline for Teacher Ed, and it really wasn't that difficult.

And then last night, it hit me again. I said, I can't do this. I can't finish chapter summaries and go to my study group and be prepared for this test and practice piano and everything else on my calendar and actually stay sane.
And you know what God said? He said, "No, you can't... alone. But I'm your God. And you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you."
Talk about a wake-up call! See, my parents are not going to come down to my college and rescue me if I fail. I'm on my own. But this is just another reason to rely fully on God.

I'm reading the book of Psalms, and today I'm on chapter 40. It's a beautiful story of needing God, and below I have verses 1-3, 5, 12-13, 17, but I encourage you to read the entire chapter.

I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing,a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.
O Lord my God, you have performed many wonders for us. Your plans for us are too numerous to list. You have no equal. If I tried to recite all your wonderful deeds, I would never come to the end of them.
For troubles surround me— too many to count! My sins pile up so high I can’t see my way out. They outnumber the hairs on my head. I have lost all courage. Please, Lord, rescue me! Come quickly, Lord, and help me.
As for me, since I am poor and needy, let the Lord keep me in his thoughts. You are my helper and my savior. O my God, do not delay.

No comments:

Post a Comment